It’s not always easy to find a therapist that’s right for you. When you’re looking for one, it’s often when your defenses are low and you’re overwhelmed with stress; you might feel depressed, or maybe your nerves are frayed; you might well be filled with anxiety. Whatever the size and shape of the distress you’re experiencing, it can be difficult to open up to anyone. And the prospect of doing that with someone you’ve never met before? That can feel downright intimidating.

Many of us have a Yeah, but part that responds when we start leaning toward therapy. “That’s all well and good,” it says, “but there are others who have it worse than I do. Let them go to therapy first. They need it more. They deserve it more.” Or it might say, “Yeah, but if I just try harder, things will change. I just need to have more willpower.”

If you’re considering therapy, you might hear some pretty tough questions in your head: Do I really need therapy? What exactly do you do in therapy? What even is therapy? Could it help me? And what if it can’t?